I Don’t Know Sometimes

Is all of this real?  I wonder if it’s all fake and illusion sometimes.  Each of us are living in our own worlds in our own heads and there are these constant assaults from foreign entities trying to get in and affect how we do and see things.  Reality to me is bizarre behavior to you.

Why would you do that?  It’s insane.

I just figured you didn’t care anymore so I stopped caring too.

You never were around so I made myself never around as well.

You’re acting like a sociopath.

How can you just turn off caring like a light switch?

And then the apologies come from me, not you.  You’re steadfast in your righteousness.  I just want to make it all better.  You’re wrong, I’m right but I’m wrong and you’re right.  Stomp your foot down and hold your ground.  It’s the only thing that matters now.  Our individual perceptions are our realities and other realities are lies to us.

Uh huh, sure.  I don’t believe you.

Well why didn’t you just say something.

All you had to do was say, “I need you.”

Normal people don’t act like that.

It’s fine.

How do I know you’re not full of shit?  Are you lying?  Do you even know if you’re lying?

I’ve always thought it interesting that a person can be lying to themselves on such a deep level that they don’t even know it.  That they then convince themselves of this lie so thoroughly that it isn’t a lie anymore.

I’ll just set the clock 5 minutes early so I trick myself into waking up on time.

I’m eating some ice cream now but I’m not going to count it because I used the stairs instead of the elevator today.

Well yeah, but if I’m nice today then I can be blunt later and say something I don’t like and they can’t tell me I’m always so mean.

Humanity is fucking weird, man.

4 thoughts on “I Don’t Know Sometimes

    • Yeah…I don’t even know sometimes (hence the title).
      It’s like…almost without the ability to talk. Contradictory and nonsensical. Around and around and around.

      Some people love thinking they can do no wrong and lying to themselves about it.

      Liked by 1 person

        • It’s an interesting exercise but one that doesn’t really lead you anywhere but frustrated and without an answer in the end.
          Trying to figure out why people do what they do usually just boils down to “because they want to.”
          I guess and assume and try and connect the dots. it makes sense in a way that they don’t like to admit fault or go against their nature.
          People just…they always want to be the good ones or the ones that aren’t at fault or on the bad side rather than just admitting it and trying to be better.

          Liked by 1 person

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