Maybe I don’t know what love is

I think I said it before, perhaps you know what love is while you’re in it and when you’re not it’s like trying to remember what the beach feels like in the winter.

I loved a girl, until I didn’t.  At least I think I might still love her and right now its just a frustrating mess of Christmas lights all tangled up since December 29th.  Maybe this is the end of the me loving her because I’m done, or it’s just another hiccup until it runs the other way on the pendulum.  I can’t remember her eyes or her touch and I think of trying to pull a smile from her lips the same way as helping a neighbor move a piano into their house.

Sometimes the music doesn’t seem worth it until you hear it.

I can love full throttle still.  It never stopped.  The only thing I’m unsure of is whether anyone wants that kind of love.  Which, if they don’t, I’m fine with it.  I’d rather have nothing then be a burden.  I’d just like to know, you know.

Love is conflict.  I read that people build walls to see who is willing to tear them down.  I also read that we need to let people go sometimes.  Love is contradiction.

Love doesn’t make sense.  It’s what people are willing to give into it for however long they are willing to do so.  It doesn’t have to be between the same two people for the rest of their lives.  Love can weave in and out and around while coming back to the same person multiple times and only bumping up some for a flash of a second.  Stop trying to tell love what it is and just enjoy it while you have it.  Love doesn’t care what you think or what you say, it just happens.