I sent you a song the other day. I said I thought you’d like the guy’s voice. You said you’d add it to the list and sent one back.
I listened to it and liked it. I usually do like your suggestions, but I don’t know if I like them because I like them or do I like them because you suggested them. Have you gotten so deep inside that you’re affecting me that much, that I can’t decide whether I’m me or I’m me because of how it relates to you?
The latter would make sense. I’m sure everyone would believe it too.
You never answered whether you liked my suggestion or not. Figures. I’ve always liked you more than you’ve liked me, and I guess that’s the eternity that I’m left to wade through.
I love a girl who doesn’t love me back.
It’s not her fault though.
I’m just tired and I wish I could stop, but love’s hunger is everlasting.
Love is like one of the worst mosquito bites in one of the hardest to reach places.
It’s elusive. No matter how many times you try to reach love, it always seems like its just outside of your nails. You claw and dig and fight for it but you can’t quite get the right angle to feel it. Despite your best efforts you can never grasp love when you’re trying your damn hardest.
And then you rub up against a desk and your ankle nicks the corner then suddenly you feel euphoria. The feeling is better than anything you ever thought possible while, at the same time, being painful.
Loving someone is letting them hurt you in ways you didn’t know you would hurt. Not in an intentional way, but in a kind of way where you always want to be around them and know there isn’t enough hours in the day to satisfy your craving.
Love buzzes in your ear. Love bites. Love itches. Love frustrates and infuriates.
At the same time love gives you one of the greatest feelings you could ever imagine.
Love can be quite annoying, but so damn satisfying.
Like scratching an itch from a mosquito bite.
I can’t remember what attraction looked like before your eyes.
I’m haunted by you.
Your lips. Your stare. Your everything.
I can only see you. I think this may be how I serve my sentence. In love with someone who is in everyone, but never her.
There are times we must say goodnight to things that once made us happy but have lost the ability to do so. We often don’t want to, but moving on is the only way to keep the pleasant memories as they are.
If we linger they spoil.
Sometimes a smile is all we have left.
I envy the pain that’s ached your life and has carved such beautiful scars.
I wish I could hurt as bad as you have.
To know the ripping contrast of emptiness and burning need
To be haunted by soft lips
To hear the echo of your name in her voice
Frozen at the smell of her perfume.
I wish I could have loved as you have loved
and etched memories in my depths and in my soul.
To know the anger of being forgotten and to tell her I have forgotten her too.
To tell her I don’t feel the pain she caused anymore because
I can’t remember the way we kissed or how it killed me every time.
I will never sing any language as eloquent as you
I can never hope to love a woman with your passion and vigor
All I can dream is that the pains I feel are deep
All I can ask is that when she leaves I’ll know a part of what you suffered.
May 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
June 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
July 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
August 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
September 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
October 2017: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
November 2017: …
December 2017: …
January 2018: What do I want? Everything! When do I want it? Now!
February – September 2018: What do I want? It all to go back to how it was. When do I want it? Months ago.
October 2018: What do I want? Someone else? When do I want it? Now?
November 2018: What do I want? I have no idea. When do I want it? Now.
December 2018: What do I want? You! When do I want it? Now!
January 2019: What do I want? Nothing to change! When do I want it? Forever!
February 2019: What do I want? Nothing to change! When do I want it? Forever!
March 2019: What do I want? These fucking games to end. When do I want it? Now!
April 2019: What do I want? You, I think. When do I want it? I’m not sure anymore.
I can feel the words
and sometimes they hurt.
I can hear the music
and sometimes its sad.
I can see the end
and sometimes its awful.
I can taste the salt
and sometimes it doesn’t stop.
I can witness the horrors of every day
and sometimes I can cry.